@dampscot @qag @cstross It seems to partly be because they can't big-picture. I live in a 15 minute neighbourhood, and my suburban acquaintances often say things like, "I could never do groceries in a place like that. I have kids." So I tell them about the families in my area and what they do, and they mention something else they can't imagine.
They've been told all their lives their way of life is the best way, and 15MC points out that isn't so, and threatens to take it away.