@evan @OliviaVespera It seems to be more the other way.. people setup relays then find when you've got a few hundred people subscribing to all that data it's not sustainable, so the relay shuts down.
Means it can be hard to find active relays.. sites listing them are often so far out of date as to be useless.
As a single user instance I link to 6 relays which is probably overkill (I don't know of a way to measure how active each one is, to pare it down) and don't find it overwhelming.