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@skinnylatte A frustration I find is that beyond casual fashion, things are typically so much more strongly gendered and it's necessary to make a lot of explicit choices about how one is going to differ from the rest of the world

But also this may be a me problem, because I want even my "lazy" choices to feel deliberate and I have extremely strong feeling about how different pieces of clothing should fit. I think a lot of people out there just regard success with clothes as "did I look like the (very gender-conforming) model in the ad?" or maybe just don't have as much feelings about the whole process as I do