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My wife has a theory that sometimes I am completely unaware of how I present in the American work environment, so when people are expecting a submissive and agreeable Asian woman, they get.. me, instead. Basically, I conduct myself like a white woman.

I was joking about this with a direct report at my last job, and she (a white woman) said, actually, you conduct yourself like a white man. It's probably confusing to some people, especially here in Monterey.

I used to be so confused by this. 'Why aren't people just believing what I say? It's a fact!' And people have to remind me of how I present in this place. 'Nobody ever doubted me back home'

That, more than money, more than luxury, is something I don't know I will ever understand innately.