@Humpleupagus @matty @tyler Oh for FUCK'S SAKE. Apparently my distro can't fucking explore an ISO without mounting or burning it to a thumb drive, of which I have no empty ones, and my Blu-Ray drive broke years ago. And search engines OF COURSE ARE ZERO HELP. Resorting to chat AI, it only tells me several command-line applications. Which I can't install, because my APT is fucked up (I can't install, or even upgrade, any of my applications, the kernel, or any part of the OS) because I haven't updated my distro version in several years, so now all the configs point to the old Debian servers and I don't want to bother figuring out how to get APT to point to the new Debian servers. I really need to hurry my ass up and buy that new PC so I can throw this 11-yo boomer in the trash.

Edit: oh wait, I have 7z already! Well, lemme give 'er a try.