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1. Embed this notice
   Hoss Delgado (hoss@shitpost.cloud)'s status on Thursday, 13-Aug-2026 11:54:14 JST Hoss Delgado

   • weknowwhygary
   >be USSR, late 1960s
   >build MiG-25 Foxbat
   >actual design requirement: intercept extremely fast American bombers at extremely high altitude
   >basically a flying surface-to-air missile battery with a cockpit
   >enormous engines
   >enormous radar
   >goes Mach Fuck
   >turning radius roughly equivalent to the administrative borders of Kazakhstan
   >made largely of stainless steel because titanium is expensive and Ivan owns a perfectly good welding torch
   >perfectly adequate for intended job
   >Americans see blurry photographs of it
   >INTELLIGENCE ANALYSIS TIME
   >"Holy shit."
   >"Twin engines."
   >"Gigantic wings."
   >"Mach 3."
   >"Huge radar."
   >"The Soviets have clearly invented some kind of super-fighter."
   >US analysts start filling in every unknown characteristic with the most terrifying answer imaginable
   >must be incredibly maneuverable
   >must have incredible range
   >must have revolutionary materials
   >must dominate everything we currently fly
   >entire Pentagon collectively hallucinates fictional MiG-25 in its head
   >Soviet intelligence notices Americans are terrified of Foxbat
   >looks at actual Foxbat
   >looks back at Americans
   >"yes"
   >"that is exactly what we have built"
   >"please continue believing this"
   >unexpected propaganda victory
   >capitalists apparently frightened by giant stainless-steel telephone pole with afterburners
   >nobody in Moscow feels compelled to correct them
   >US response is completely rational and proportionate
   >spends enormous resources developing fighter specifically to beat the imaginary Soviet aircraft
   >result: F-15 Eagle
   >massive radar
   >absurd thrust-to-weight ratio
   >excellent visibility
   >highly maneuverable
   >long-range missiles
   >powerful engines
   >genuinely enormous upgrade potential
   >design philosophy basically "what if MiG-25 but every terrifying thing we imagined about it was actually true"
   >Soviets watching development reports
   >"wait"
   >"comrade, Americans appear to be building counter-Foxbat"
   >"excellent"
   >"no, you misunderstand"
   >"they are building the Foxbat they thought WE built"
   >1976
   >Viktor Belenko defects to Japan in MiG-25
   >Americans finally get to dissect one
   >open panels
   >stainless steel
   >vacuum tubes
   >welds everywhere
   >engines that can reach ludicrous speeds largely by eating their own lifespan
   >giant radar powerful enough to interrogate God but technologically rather less magical than expected
   >airframe optimized for going extremely fast in mostly the same direction
   >Pentagon engineers staring at it like archaeologists discovering the terrifying dragon skeleton is actually farm equipment
   >"Wait, this isn't an air-superiority fighter."
   >"No."
   >"It can't dogfight an F-15."
   >"No."
   >"It can't really dogfight an F-4."
   >"Not the point."
   >"Why is it made out of steel?"
   >"Because steel works."
   >"Why did we think this thing was the final boss?"
   >"You tell us."
   >Soviets had accidentally pulled history's greatest procurement psyop without actually planning one
   >problem: joke has now catastrophically backfired
   >America did not merely discover Foxbat wasn't the monster it feared
   >America had already built the monster
   >USSR: possesses specialized high-speed interceptor
   >USA: possesses F-15
   >Foxbat propaganda W instantly converts into aerospace L
   >imagine bluffing that you have Excalibur
   >enemy becomes terrified
   >enemy spends ten years forging actual Excalibur
   >enemy eventually captures your sword
   >it's a sharpened crowbar
   >"HAHA! You capitalist fools! You fell for our deception!"
   >F-15 takes off in background
   >entire Soviet design bureau stops laughing
   >now have to develop MiG-29 and Su-27 because Americans responded to imaginary Soviet wunderwaffe by making the wunderwaffe real
   >Cold War procurement was incredible
   >US intelligence: "the enemy has invented a terrifying machine that does not exist"
   >US aerospace industry: "understood, we'll have one ready shortly"
   >USSR: "THAT WAS NOT THE INTENDED OUTCOME"
   
   RT: https://nicecrew.digital/objects/8052a15f-cdbc-44f3-9372-7ed7dd49a6ac
   • Embed this notice
     Nova ?? :confederateflag: :nv: (lordmordred@poa.st)'s status on Friday, 14-Aug-2026 00:09:45 JST Nova ?? :confederateflag: :nv:

     in reply to

     • weknowwhygary
     @Hoss @weknowwhygary
   • Embed this notice
     Crit (sic_guy@poa.st)'s status on Friday, 14-Aug-2026 00:16:46 JST Crit

     in reply to

     • Nova ?? :confederateflag: :nv:
     • weknowwhygary
     @LordMordred @Hoss @weknowwhygary You know what, I was going to make a G Gundam reference and yet...
     
     ...posting that plane flying with only 1 wing is way more bad-ass:
   • Embed this notice
     Hoss Delgado (hoss@shitpost.cloud)'s status on Friday, 14-Aug-2026 00:16:46 JST Hoss Delgado

     in reply to

     • Nova ?? :confederateflag: :nv:
     • Crit
     • weknowwhygary
     That was an Israeli F-15, so I presume some kind of emergency ancient jew magic was used to keep the airframe aloft.
   • Embed this notice
     soapone (soapone@pone.social)'s status on Friday, 14-Aug-2026 00:18:32 JST soapone

     in reply to

     • weknowwhygary

     @Hoss @weknowwhygary
     back when engineers actually worked in machine shops and could design things that could be manufactured.

   • Embed this notice
     That Would Be Telling (thatwouldbetelling@shitposter.world)'s status on Friday, 14-Aug-2026 00:18:32 JST That Would Be Telling

     in reply to

     • soapone
     • weknowwhygary

     @soapone @Hoss @weknowwhygary Well, the error in going from the design blueprints to whatever you call the shop floor instructions resulted in insufficiently strong longerons connecting the cockpit and radar to the rest of the plane suggests that.

     But the general narrative is bullshit. The US Air Force got caught up in the TFX boondoggle which never delivered an air superiority fighter, of the 3-5 promised versions only the deep interdiction F-111 bomber survived. Which forced them to fly the Navy :cirnoForReals: F-4 for a long time. But given a clean slate they were always going to try to create something like the F-15 for pretty much all the obvious reasons.

     That it has some operational characteristics of the MiG-25 is more like parallel evolution of generically desirable stuff: high thrust to get up to altitude quickly (vs. F-14 interceptor which focused on fast horizontal travel to defend ships), honking big radar the plane was build around for Sparrows and later missiles, can carry a lot of stuff, etc.

     Ironic outcome perhaps worth mentioning: the Strike Eagle replaced the F-111, and nowadays everyone buying F-15s for whatever missions gets a two seat version like it.

     Hoss Delgado likes this.
   • Embed this notice
     Hoss Delgado (hoss@shitpost.cloud)'s status on Friday, 14-Aug-2026 00:18:55 JST Hoss Delgado

     in reply to

     • soapone
     • That Would Be Telling
     • weknowwhygary
     I prefer to continue believing the legend because it's funnier.