Conversation

Notices

1. Embed this notice
   akkoma flavored lizzy (fleckenstein@lizzy.rs alt) (lizzy@social.vlhl.dev)'s status on Wednesday, 04-Dec-2024 05:30:11 JST akkoma flavored lizzy (fleckenstein@lizzy.rs alt)
   i feel like monogamy isn't all that bad of an option based on what i've seen and experienced myself.
   
   poly might feel like an easy solution and some poly people feel a certain sense of superiority for their approach to relationships but honestly, depending on what you want from relationships it brings a lot more problems than it solves.
   
   being poly worked well for me when i was in a phase where i wanted to mess around and cuddle and kiss people and do some sex and kink stuff but it started to become contradictory at the point where i started wanting to, basically, share my life with a partner, including living together, sharing our money, spending most of the day together etc.
   
   another thing to consider is that jealousy generally isn't something that you can just stop from happening by having the right mindset or something; some people are naturally jealous, others are not, and for some people a poly relationship just doesn't work because of that. and no, this is not oppressive and has nothing to do with the desire to control your partner or whatever.
   
   in the end it depends a bit on your priorities and what types of relationships you want to have. in either case self control is necessary as well as the ability to compromise and not necessarily act out every desire you might feel.
   
   in other words, so, you can't "simply be poly". nothing about being poly is simple, deciding to be poly is a serious commitment, just like deciding to be mono is.
   • Haelwenn /элвэн/ :triskell: and snacks like this.
   • Embed this notice
     meso (meso@the.asbestos.cafe)'s status on Wednesday, 04-Dec-2024 05:30:10 JST meso

     in reply to
     @lizzy poly is for NIGGERS
     snacks likes this.
   • Embed this notice
     small, versatile 6DoF c++ witch *ada (ada@zoner.work)'s status on Wednesday, 04-Dec-2024 05:56:31 JST small, versatile 6DoF c++ witch *ada

     in reply to

     • Julia :v_trans: :v_bi: (not cute)

     @julia@eepy.moe @lizzy@social.vlhl.dev mostly unrelated but being bi and mono is still valid. you are still bi even if you get married and end up going in the forever box.

     snacks likes this.
   • Embed this notice
     Julia :v_trans: :v_bi: (not cute) (julia@eepy.moe)'s status on Wednesday, 04-Dec-2024 05:56:32 JST Julia :v_trans: :v_bi: (not cute)

     in reply to

     @lizzy@social.vlhl.dev big agree, I'm very annoyed when people tell me to just be poly so I can satisfy the want for a femme partner while in a straight monogamous relationship but like. If I was in a gay monogamous relationship it'd be the same. And I get jealous. It wouldn't work.

   • Embed this notice
     Julia :v_trans: :v_bi: (not cute) (julia@eepy.moe)'s status on Wednesday, 04-Dec-2024 05:56:32 JST Julia :v_trans: :v_bi: (not cute)

     in reply to

     @lizzy@social.vlhl.dev simply put I am too bisexual for my own good (and let jealousy set in too easily)