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   CJ Paloma Likes Longer Days (cjpaloma@mas.to)'s status on Tuesday, 30-Jul-2024 05:48:34 JST CJ Paloma Likes Longer Days

   I am curious about how many people have heard of and generally understand what the term DARVO means.

   Who could get a series of good conversations going about it? Because understanding the general dynamics of the ideas behind it could be really helpful for lots of people.

   • Embed this notice
     samiamsam (samiamsam@mastodon.social)'s status on Tuesday, 30-Jul-2024 05:48:31 JST samiamsam

     in reply to

     @cjpaloma i've been sharing this link lately because it shows how people can convince themselves of anything

     it is a film that everyone needs to see right now

     https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Conspiracy_(2001_film)

   • Embed this notice
     samiamsam (samiamsam@mastodon.social)'s status on Tuesday, 30-Jul-2024 05:48:32 JST samiamsam

     in reply to

     @cjpaloma

     that level of denial is likely related to a personality disorder

     personality disorders are never cured, only managed and that takes constant work and sometimes medication

     my lived experience is that people with personality disorders know what they are doing and don't care to change

     unless of course their behavior leads to them not getting what they want - in which case they change for a bit to draw people back in, only to abuse them again

     that is a conscious choice

   • Embed this notice
     CJ Paloma Likes Longer Days (cjpaloma@mas.to)'s status on Tuesday, 30-Jul-2024 05:48:32 JST CJ Paloma Likes Longer Days

     in reply to

     • samiamsam

     @samiamsam I'm a licensed MH professional: tons of folks without personality disorders go into full clinical level denial about lots of things.

     People in substance abuse recovery (for example) do not do sociopathic things like steal from family members once they are in recovery.

     Clinical denial is tricky as hell and -not- well understood by most of us- and it has been present in lots of people in every human caused atrocity that has ever happened.

     Psychology has tons of work to do.

     Mr. Bill repeated this.
   • Embed this notice
     CJ Paloma Likes Longer Days (cjpaloma@mas.to)'s status on Tuesday, 30-Jul-2024 05:48:33 JST CJ Paloma Likes Longer Days

     in reply to

     • samiamsam

     @samiamsam Right... it's both a conscious tactic/strategy among some folks (lawyers, PR repair folks, etc. come to mind)

     But the DENIAL aspect is sometimes/often(?) due to a clinical level denial --which is an impairment.

     Clinical level denial is not "just stubbornness". And I suspect that's part of what makes it become so effective.

     So it does add layers of complexity that some fools doing abusive crap really don't even "get" how off base they are.

     It's not an excuse.

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     samiamsam (samiamsam@mastodon.social)'s status on Tuesday, 30-Jul-2024 05:48:34 JST samiamsam

     in reply to

     @cjpaloma

     Deny
     Attack
     Reverse Victim and Offender

     right out of the abusers playbook