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   NaClKnight (naclknight@mstdn.games)'s status on Sunday, 19-May-2024 15:55:43 JST NaClKnight

   I have bad emotions right now. that's fine. Once upon a time i used to think that if i described them in the right way with perfect diction and syntax, that i could make these feelings go away.

   Or at least that someone would read or hear my descriptions and tell me they'd felt that way too, or that they wanted to help me not feel that way anymore

   Every poem was asking for help.

   Then i turned 23 and stopped writing stupid fucking poems.

   I'm 31 now & my perfect words have never once helped me.

   • Embed this notice
     NaClKnight (naclknight@mstdn.games)'s status on Sunday, 19-May-2024 16:03:21 JST NaClKnight

     in reply to

     • socks

     @socks Thank you! I'm glad, and sorry, that it's relatable. It sucks.

     I'm utterly miserable right now. I'm giving up on my oldest hobby because the emotional highs it produces aren't worth these abysmal lows. I spent a lot of time and money trying to understand why these lows feel like this, to understand and protect myself, to reduce their amplitude.

     but in the end i think it's time to give up and admit that the problem is me and it always has been.

     No metaphor or analogy will change me

   • Embed this notice
     socks (socks@mastodon.online)'s status on Sunday, 19-May-2024 16:03:22 JST socks

     in reply to

     @NaClKnight That's too dang real. It hurts to see someone write it out, but it's real.