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   Drew DeVault (drewdevault@fosstodon.org)'s status on Sunday, 10-Dec-2023 02:21:37 JST Drew DeVault

   Working on an article for a feminist men's site: "Dating advice for lonely men". The goal is to provide a feminist resource as an alternative to men falling prey to incels.

   The group we're working on this in is specifically designed to give men space to grow without imposing on womens' and queer communities, and as such is non-intersectional (men only): so I'm reaching out to find women who're interested in providing feedback on the draft from your own feminist perspective. Any takers?

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     Drew DeVault (drewdevault@fosstodon.org)'s status on Sunday, 10-Dec-2023 02:22:43 JST Drew DeVault

     in reply to

     • Mattias Bengtsson

     @mattiasb oh totally I agree that this is a vanishingly small minority. But I also get this pushback a lot even from feminists that don't argue for a total exclusion of men, that men can't be trusted to talk about their own issues and perspectives on feminism. It's not a party line in the way straight-up kill-all-the-men is portrayed (sarcastically or otherwise), rather it's a bias which presents in more subtle forms.

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     Mattias Bengtsson (mattiasb@mastodon.xyz)'s status on Sunday, 10-Dec-2023 02:22:52 JST Mattias Bengtsson

     in reply to

     @drewdevault I believe the group of feminists that want a total exclusion of men from the feminist movement is a minority. They have their reasons and I really believe that arguing their way is counter productive.

     Ultimately as a man who cares about these issues I think the best course of action is to focus on interacting with the women who do see that men are needed. And I do believe men are needed, especially when it comes to interacting with other men who's still in denial.

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     Drew DeVault (drewdevault@fosstodon.org)'s status on Sunday, 10-Dec-2023 02:22:54 JST Drew DeVault

     in reply to

     Been struggling a lot lately with some feminist discourse which invokes feelings of "men can't be trusted to talk about their problems". This has been beating me down a bit lately.

     I mean, in the end, I get it. I really, honestly get it. I know why this raises anxiety in those who suffer the most under patriarchy. But I have to ask: what is the goal of feminism? Does the ideal post-feminist world include men? At some point we have to offer men some trust.

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     Drew DeVault (drewdevault@fosstodon.org)'s status on Sunday, 10-Dec-2023 02:22:54 JST Drew DeVault

     in reply to

     Some of us are really trying to do our best as men to address these problems, and our perspective as men is necessary for other men to join us in these goals. On the one hand, I entirely understand the anxiety that leads people to make male-excluding spaces in the first place, but on the other hand, extending that exclusion to the entire discourse is not going to bring about the feminist revolution. Please consider lending us some support and trust, if you can.