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   CJ Bellwether (siege@octodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 17-Sep-2023 23:43:25 JST CJ Bellwether

   so i have a friend who's job is basically to catch politicians (mainly female) and celebrities before they throw out random thoughtless stuff about topics like trans rights (otherwise known as doing a richard ayoade) and help troubleshoot them through a process of quietly meeting real people involved who theyd get on with, learning and understanding which is like thank god someone is actually doing that in the physical world.

   But my issue is through her i end up learning about a good handful of specific well known people who arent "pro-trans" but fall more into the wide bucket of "ignorant and unaffected but in danger of blurting something terrible out" rather than the more dangerous "fuelled by deep and animus against trans people". And so i have had to in the past take a deep breath and reply "bb please can you delete those last three messages you just sent me because if i one day end up in a just fuck it all mood i might just screen cap that and shoot it out to the world and i dont want to do that right now because im calm and realise it would actually hurt trans rights if i did that", because i know she gets results and she gets people to where they need to be (ie shutting the hell up and slowly learning).

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     CJ Bellwether (siege@octodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 17-Sep-2023 23:46:51 JST CJ Bellwether

     in reply to

     • maya_b

     @maya_b my soul is held together by the power of juicy gossip that if i shared it could catastrophically affect my own right to life, its like tantric gossiping.

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     maya_b (maya_b@hachyderm.io)'s status on Sunday, 17-Sep-2023 23:46:53 JST maya_b

     in reply to

     @siege sounds exhausting and traumatizing by proxy

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     CJ Bellwether (siege@octodon.social)'s status on Sunday, 17-Sep-2023 23:53:23 JST CJ Bellwether

     in reply to

     • Bubbly Evie :verified_trans:

     @Evie the more trans people are out there existing and meeting people the more it radically changes others. Its our greatest weapon.

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     Bubbly Evie :verified_trans: (evie@hachyderm.io)'s status on Sunday, 17-Sep-2023 23:53:24 JST Bubbly Evie :verified_trans:

     in reply to

     @siege ahh crap, now I gotta look up what richard ayoade did. unless it's just referring to his brand of communication. 😂

     but yeah... it's weird the people i've flipped over the years by just taking something they thought was really terrible or they were afraid of... and i just making it normal and boring by existing. (ok, that was my brand in early transition!!)

     but showing we're well rounded people with normal, rich, happy, vibrant lives, with ups and downs, helps.

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     CJ Bellwether (siege@octodon.social)'s status on Monday, 18-Sep-2023 00:07:26 JST CJ Bellwether

     in reply to

     • Sharkgirl Transpiring

     @JoscelynTransient i can say theres been some good positive movements with people who are important yes. Better for potential political futures at the very least.

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     Sharkgirl Transpiring (joscelyntransient@chaosfem.tw)'s status on Monday, 18-Sep-2023 00:07:28 JST Sharkgirl Transpiring

     in reply to

     @siege yeah, during my wife's work with ILGA World, I've gotten to know quite a few people for whom that's a big chunk of their activist work. It's important, but I'm not sure I would ever had the patience for it.

     I will say, the progress Japanese LGBTQ activists have made using that strategy has been really effective there and it is the kind of place that the need for education is a bigger factor than active politicization against our existence. I wish we had more of that before the politicization of our existence took off in the Anglosphere. I hope that your friend is making progress though and helping get people who can be powerful allies onto our side before it's too late

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     Sleepy time tea bear (sleepytimeteabear@octodon.social)'s status on Monday, 18-Sep-2023 01:19:53 JST Sleepy time tea bear

     in reply to

     @siege she does the lords work but definitely has a blind spot towards how telling us ‘oh heehee, you know how it is, so hard to convince ~normal~ people you trans folks are human, but it’s a living!’ Is landing 🙄

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     CJ Bellwether (siege@octodon.social)'s status on Monday, 18-Sep-2023 01:22:44 JST CJ Bellwether

     in reply to

     • Sleepy time tea bear

     @Sleepytimeteabear truth