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1. Embed this notice
   Melancholic Mediocrity :v_bi: (libertyforward1@beige.party)'s status on Saturday, 15-Aug-2026 05:59:41 JST Melancholic Mediocrity :v_bi:

   FINAL UPDATE (for this fundraiser): We just shot past the finish line. Not only do we now have a functional, legal car, we have rent, we have enough to make the auto insurance payment for said car and the electric bill to boot!!!!!!!

   My dear Fedi friends, thank you so very much for bearing with us as we strive to someday get our shit together. We are incredibly grateful. ❤️

   UPDATE: We're two days from deadline, and we're getting very close to making goal, along with the anxiety-ridden executive paralysis. I would love it if we could get it covered by tomorrow so that if anything goes wrong with the second attempt at an emissions test on the car, I can have something *good* with which to distract myself.

   I must admit sadly the current total isn't completely accurate because I had to use some of the funds to pay for the emissions test, gas to drive the car far enough for the emissions test to actually work (hopefully this time!!🤞) and food. I *think* my pay advance tomorrow will be enough to make up for the borrowed funds.

   I am incredibly grateful to all of our Fedi friends who've pitched in. I'm thrilled that we've had a few more smaller donations than usual, because that eases the burden on the handful of insanely generous people who have shouldered the bulk of our needs!

   I'm telling you folks, #MutualAid is literally the only reason my partner, our border collie and I are clothed, fed, and sheltered. I am not kidding when I say that it saves lives.

   Gotta drive to work. Cross your fingers that I get there and back without being pulled over or the check engine light popping on!

   ============================================

   Hi everyone,

   For those of you who haven't followed my soap opera-like existence here on the Fediwebs, my partner, our co-dependent border collie and I have unfortunately had to rely on the community here to survive, thanks to our chronic mental health challenges.

   I've also made several expensive financial mistakes lately trying to prioritize which of our ongoing monetary crises; the most simple of which is I felt embarrassed fundraising non-stop and procrastinated too long, costing us steep, unnecessary fees.

   The total amount of the aforementioned fees was a bit of a slap in the face that seems to have finally gotten through my thick head.

   So.. we owe $1210 at the time of this writing which is due by August 14th and instead of waiting until the last moment, for once I am being proactive and starting this right away.

   My sincere apologies that we've had to constantly begpost lately.

   My plan is to try and raise this as soon as possible and then move immediately to working on September's total and have that in place *before* the end of the month.

   By that point, we're hoping and praying that my partner will have new employment by then that doesn't constantly trigger his PTSD, and/or I find a second job.. or potentially go back to school. Or something. (Onlyfans maybe? lol) Because things are clearly not fucking working as they are currently.

   I know many (most) of you are understandably sick and tired of seeing our begposts. My friends, please don't give up on us yet. I swear we're trying our best, meager as those efforts may be.

   If you're willing AND able, please boost and if possible donate. If you can't donate, *do NOT feel guilty* for being in the same boat as us. Your feelings about it are valid but rest assured you needn't feel bad.

   Venmo: https://venmo.com/thegizmotwins
   Cashapp: https://cash.app/$thegizmotwins
   PP: https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/gizmo1982
   GFM: https://gofund.me/12171be3

   #Solidarity #BPD #PTSD #Poverty #MentalIllness @mutualaid

2. Embed this notice
   Melancholic Mediocrity :v_bi: (libertyforward1@beige.party)'s status on Sunday, 02-Aug-2026 08:48:40 JST Melancholic Mediocrity :v_bi:

   UPDATE (already lol):

   My partner insists that it might be insulting to the person who lent us money, to directly fundraise on their behalf because they told my partner to keep it when they sent it. I'm not sure I entirely agree with my partner about this, but I'm deferring to his judgement and closing the prior fundraiser.

   So to the incredibly kind soul who sent us that money, I will do as you ask, but on the proviso that you *MUST* let me if you encounter the slightest problem because of this, so that we can rally the Fediverse to come to your aid. I do *not* want to see others suffering because of my foolishness.

   Thank you to that person, and every other person who has helped us. We couldn't make it without you. ❤️🙏❤️🙏❤️

   ============================================

   Hello again folks,

   Please forgive the audacity of me requesting even more help before we've even completely finished the four-figure auto repair fundraiser.

   I screwed up.

   I've gotten us in over our heads with a very serious bind. I need to return the funds lent to us for the car before we can even start focusing on rent, so that I don't cause a kind friend from here on the #Fediverse to be in danger.

   S̶o̶.. u̶n̶t̶i̶l̶ *̶t̶h̶a̶t̶*̶ d̶e̶b̶t̶ i̶s̶ t̶a̶k̶e̶n̶ c̶a̶r̶e̶ o̶f̶, t̶h̶i̶s̶ w̶i̶l̶l̶ s̶e̶r̶v̶e̶ a̶s̶ a̶ p̶l̶a̶c̶e̶h̶o̶l̶d̶e̶r̶. A̶n̶y̶ f̶u̶n̶d̶s̶ w̶e̶ r̶e̶c̶e̶i̶v̶e̶ w̶i̶l̶l̶ b̶e̶ a̶p̶p̶l̶i̶e̶d̶ t̶o̶ *̶t̶h̶a̶t̶*̶ b̶e̶g̶p̶o̶s̶t̶ f̶o̶r̶ o̶u̶r̶ c̶a̶r̶, s̶o̶ p̶l̶e̶a̶s̶e̶ d̶o̶n̶'t̶ b̶e̶ a̶l̶a̶r̶m̶e̶d̶ i̶f̶ y̶o̶u̶ d̶o̶ d̶o̶n̶a̶t̶e̶ b̶e̶c̶a̶u̶s̶e̶ o̶f̶ t̶h̶i̶s̶ p̶o̶s̶t̶ b̶u̶t̶ t̶h̶e̶ C̶W̶ c̶o̶u̶n̶t̶e̶r̶ d̶o̶e̶s̶n̶'t̶ r̶e̶f̶l̶e̶c̶t̶ i̶t̶ -̶ i̶f̶ y̶o̶u̶ v̶i̶s̶i̶t̶ t̶h̶e̶ o̶t̶h̶e̶r̶ f̶u̶n̶d̶r̶a̶i̶s̶e̶r̶ p̶i̶n̶n̶e̶d̶ p̶o̶s̶t̶, y̶o̶u̶'l̶l̶ s̶e̶e̶ t̶h̶e̶ u̶p̶d̶a̶t̶e̶d̶ n̶u̶m̶b̶e̶r̶s̶.

   I apologize for having to do this so many times and for such huge amounts. I swear I'm trying my damnedest to not let everyone down.

   There. The previous paragraph is the most I'm going to allow myself to self-deprecate in this post, despite me probably looking like a looney toons character that's about to explode, by restraining my own criticism.

   Whelp.. I need to wrap this up so I can go pick up the car; that at least gives us an option if things go south regarding rent.

   If you're willing AND able, please boost and if possible donate. If you can't donate, *do NOT feel guilty* for being in the same boat as us. Your feelings about it are valid but rest assured you needn't feel bad.

   Venmo: https://venmo.com/thegizmotwins
   Cashapp: https://cash.app/$thegizmotwins
   PP: https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/gizmo1982
   GFM: https://gofund.me/12171be3

   #Solidarity #BPD #PTSD #Poverty #MentalIllness @mutualaid

3. Embed this notice
   Melancholic Mediocrity :v_bi: (libertyforward1@beige.party)'s status on Wednesday, 29-Jul-2026 14:59:35 JST Melancholic Mediocrity :v_bi:

   It's taking every last ounce of willpower I can summon to escape my depression and executive paralysis long enough to even type this. Believe it or not, this post is far *less* self-deprecating than what I would really *like* to say.

   *deep breath*

   Hi Folks,

   Evidently I'm just not capable of being an adult. Instead of addressing crises promptly, I wait until they burst into a gargantuan bonfire. It's not an ideal habit.

   I've known that I've needed to get this car fixed for months now. I've gotten three temporary extension permits and now have no recourse but to get the car to the shop *tomorrow* or it'll be a sitting duck waiting for the parking enforcement tow trucks to spring into action, and that would cost hundreds of dollars to bail my car out of jail.

   While I've considered going car-free, we live in an area where having ones own vehicle is sort of a necessity.

   Wtaf is wrong with me that I would think it acceptable to wait until the last twenty-four hours I'm legally able to move my car, to try and raise nearly two grand to fix said car?

   🤦♂️ Why 🤦♂️ can't 🤦♂️ I 🤦♂️ get 🤦♂️ my 🤦♂️ shit 🤦♂️ together 🤦♂️ o 🤦♂️ m 🤦♂️ f 🤦♂️ g 🤦♂️

   We have been in this apartment for eight months now and *still* can't manage to pay for rent without help, which I'm going to need to raise money for as soon as we finish *this* fundraiser. It's embarrassing that we still can't make it on our own.

   *sigh*

   I'm sorry.. I'm sort of at a loss for what else to say.

   Mea culpa I guess.

   If you're willing AND able, please boost and if possible donate. If you can't donate, *do NOT feel guilty* for being in the same boat as us. Your feelings about it are valid but rest assured you needn't feel bad.

   Venmo: https://venmo.com/thegizmotwins
   Cashapp: https://cash.app/$thegizmotwins
   PP: https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/gizmo1982
   GFM: https://gofund.me/12171be3

   #Solidarity #BPD #PTSD #Poverty #MentalIllness @mutualaid

4. Embed this notice
   Melancholic Mediocrity :v_bi: (libertyforward1@beige.party)'s status on Sunday, 24-May-2026 16:14:00 JST Melancholic Mediocrity :v_bi:

   Folks, I was walking our codependent border collie around our apartment complex tonight, enjoying the ambiance of a quaint, village-like atmosphere.

   It reminded me that I really, really don't want to lose this apartment that you've all given us.. The problem is, I haven't yet landed a second job, and the hours at my current job have not been encouraging; my partner has also been getting less hours at his job as well.

   We're behind on auto insurance, and I've got two days next week where I can try and get the car in somewhere to have them replace the canister purge valve, and we're beginning to run low on food.

   So the time I've been dreading since the last time we did this has now arrived, and I must once again ask for your help. I've been dreading it because it's incredibly embarrassing to have to keep doing this and for the amounts we have to keep asking for.

   The good news is we're starting this fundraiser with $135 thanks to a premature donation (unlike some things, I don't mind when that happens!), so we've already gotten the ball rolling as I post this.

   It's scary because what if we don't make it? Each time I'm scared people will finally get fed up with us, or that they will fall into similar circumstances as us, as the world economy collapses thanks to.. well, you know, and then what happens? What do we do?

   I repeat myself over and over with these fundraising posts because I feel compelled to try and explain myself; to try and prove that I'm asking for this help in earnest, that I'm trying my best even if it doesn't seem like it.

   Why do I do this every time? I don't know. This is just how I'm wired, I guess. The thought of *not* infodumping with every fundraiser makes me feel queasy and anxious, I'm not kidding. I don't feel like I'm 'putting in the effort' if I don't word-vomit an essay.

   Anyway, my mediocre writing skills are probably my greatest talent, so I suppose I also offer these long-winded begposts as a token of my crude artistic skill (can we even call writing "art"?) to show my friends here that I am grateful. This isn't AI, believe it or not.. this is all hand-crafted and original and shit! lol Hopefully it's at least mildly entertaining.

   Maybe think of helping us as an investment for the public good because your support lets me fill the Fediverse with bullshit. "These #shitposts are brought to you by mental illness and by viewers like you!" (I may do more with that actually..)

   So, my dear friends.. I think I just managed to get through an entire #begpost without being profusely apologetic and excessively self-deprecating. It feels extremely unsettling. I think it's giving me a headache.

   Thank you all for your kindness, generosity, and rallying spirit; for your support and your patronage. We would literally be on the streets without you.

   If you're willing AND able, please boost and if possible donate. If you can't donate, *do NOT feel guilty* for being in the same boat as us. Your feelings about it are valid but rest assured you needn't feel bad.

   Venmo: https://venmo.com/thegizmotwins
   Cashapp: https://cash.app/$thegizmotwins
   PP: https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/gizmo1982
   GFM: https://gofund.me/12171be3

   #Solidarity #BPD #PTSD #Poverty #MentalIllness @mutualaid

5. Embed this notice
   Melancholic Mediocrity :v_bi: (libertyforward1@beige.party)'s status on Monday, 02-Mar-2026 09:26:10 JST Melancholic Mediocrity :v_bi:

   Hi Everyone,

   *sigh* I wish I had better news. I haven't felt this discouraged in quite awhile.

   My scheduled hours at work had started to climb back up to a reasonable level, but over the course of the next few weeks they rapidly descend. 28 hours (which became 22 hours when I had to drop a shift due to my slip and fall off my scooter coming home from work), 25 hours, 25 hours, and I just discovered the newest schedule was posted -- I'll be working 21 hours that week.

   It seems quite evident that I need to either get a new job, or a second job to supplement the lost income.

   If only I had the spoons to do so.

   Despite working less hours, paradoxically I seem to feel *more* fatigued from work. It's absolutely maddening. Today is my fourth day off in a row, and I spent the vast majority of the last three days just.. sleeping.

   A few weeks ago I felt a surge of energy that was heaven-sent; I started knocking tasks off my to-do list, trying to eat a little healthier, and I made a slow-cooker pork roast with veggies and even completely cleaned up after -- which I'm ashamed to admit might be the first time in my life that I've done so.

   It was incredible.. I started to feel human again. It didn't feel like I was always wading through mud. For the first time in many years I considered possibly going back to school.

   Sadly this brief lucidity drew to a close; now, both important and mundane tasks continue piling up and I'm forcing myself to write this instead of laying back down for another nap, illustrating the futility of pursuing higher education when I'm lucky if I can muster the will to shower more than once or twice per week.

   I would sell my soul to feel human like that again. Chasing that feeling of clarity, I dramatically increased my fruit/vegetable intake. I started taking fish oil supplements.

   But none of it worked. It was of such ineffectiveness that despite the dire urgency of paying rent, I'm just now writing this #begpost in the late afternoon of the first of the month. Yes, I'm aware of how stupid that is. I've been meaning to write it for days but I just couldn't muster the will to get it written until now.

   Anyway.. I feel so many things right now. I feel like I've let my online benefactors down by not getting my shit together like I was supposed to; I'm afraid of having that same stomach-churning anxiety permanently associated with this apartment complex like it was with past residences when we were getting eviction notices and the employees all looked at us with pity; I'm furious with myself that our possession of this apartment that was so generously given to us is potentially in jeopardy and I'm still too fucking tired to really do anything about it.

   I really thought we were starting to make a comeback but sadly it seems we've begun sliding towards homelessness instead of stability. Goddammit #MentalIllness is frustrating.

   Forgive me dear friends, but it's once again time for me to plead for an obscene amount of #MutualAid. I don't want to potentially lose this incredible apartment that the community gifted us, and in observance of the sunk cost fallacy, I'm asking you to throw more money at us despite already having done so countless times.

   If you're willing AND able, please boost and if possible donate. If you can't donate, *do NOT feel guilty* for being in the same boat as us. Your feelings about it are valid but rest assured you needn't feel bad.

   Venmo: https://venmo.com/thegizmotwins
   Cashapp: https://cash.app/$thegizmotwins
   PP: https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/gizmo1982
   GFM: https://gofund.me/12171be3

   #Solidarity #BPD #PTSD #Poverty @mutualaid

6. Embed this notice
   Melancholic Mediocrity :v_bi: (libertyforward1@beige.party)'s status on Friday, 14-Nov-2025 05:06:57 JST Melancholic Mediocrity :v_bi:

   Good news and bad news:

   Good news is, WE GOT APPROVED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

   Bad news is, we need $1250 in the next 24hrs if we want to get $750 knocked off the total move-in cost.

   I should have planned this better.

   The silver lining is, suprisingly they're not requiring a full month's rent for the deposit.

   EDIT: Per wise advisement, I'm including donation links below. Thank you everyone!

   Venmo: https://venmo.com/thegizmotwins
   Cashapp: https://cash.app/$thegizmotwins
   PP: https://www.paypal.com/paypalme/gizmo1982