Untitled attachment

Notices where this attachment appears

1. Embed this notice
   Erik Uden 🍑 (erikuden@mastodon.de)'s status on Sunday, 15-Sep-2024 20:06:54 JST Erik Uden 🍑

   in reply to
   Content Warning: Needles, and drug related medical stuff (panic attacks)How and Why Everything Happened

   Continuation

   An assistant put wet towels on my wrists and my neck, which pulled me further into reality. I knew a bit about these things and talked about hot chili bonbons, or a cold liquid for your forehead, or “center shocks” (candy), or ammonium which helps you wake up and come back to reality.

   I also felt incredibly hungry soon afterwards. At the time of the afternoon snack I had two pears, which didn't suffice.

   I also distracted myself by watching a calm and humorous TV show, but couldn't even finish one episode as my mind would always wander off, wanting to open other apps or writing people. I would basically have a worse impulse control. When I had the idea that I should do something (like write an E-mail) I would immediately do it, and on my way forget what I wanted to do, and then slowly later realize that I watched a TV show and wanted to do that.

   When the permanent observation by the assistant ended as I was feeling a lot more safe with what is occurring, it took me about 10 minutes to realize that he disappeared (despite him saying goodbye and explaining everything to me).

   During writing this at 17:32 I feel like a heavy weight was put on me. It stopped after a few minutes.

   The one problem I am seeing is that as of now (18:20) I only feel like the effect is 80% as high as during the beginning at 12:30. So it's still very high, despite a lot of time passing. I have figured out a way to deal with it, however!

   Similarities to first weed Trip

   Our German viewers may remember this where I talked about my first experience with weed. What happened today is exactly the same experience I had when I had a panic attack due to the sudden side effects of edibles

   Another thing I would like to add next to my experience today was the same as my experience of taking Marihuana for the first time. I had a very bad trip with a panic attack which worked almost exactly as what happened today. A few years ago when I was taking weed for the first (out of 4) time(s), I was overwhelmed by the swift realization that something happened; I lost control over my thoughts and concentration from one moment to the next, and I began panicking. I must've had a very similar panic attack back then, as the way I experienced it today. It feels very much the same as a “bad trip” starting with a panic attack.

   I may be placebo?

   (for some reason I was worried about the embarrassment of this happening on a placebo dose, it's 100% confirmed I have the compound, as three other people have the same symptoms, but one other person never felt anything. I could imagine my mind doing a lot, but waking up to feeling still high, that would be impossible)

   However, the entire thing may also be the power of suggestion. I was very interested in this study, even talked to you how some of the compound works. I've been thinking and saying that this compound must have similar effects to weed as it does something to the cannabinoid receptors. For the first day of the dose, I even experienced very light symptoms of that happening (a “good” trip). However, the first day we were also tested all day long and had to lie down a lot. The following days I didn't feel much except for dizziness and light headedness. The fact I was so overwhelmed today has a lot to do with the fact that the past days I never experienced anything like this, and hence expected the symptoms to be less and less each day. Maybe this won't ever happen again, maybe this state is now normal? We will not know.

   To be continued