apparently the company i hired to dry out the floor in my unit after a water intrusion ripped it up and destroyed it without telling me.
it's plastic. the padding might be contaminated, but the flooring is fine. was fine.
so now i need to have the flooring replaced. probably for the entire unit unless there's more of that 15 year old flooring material still on the market.
I secretly look forward to the birthday parties my kid gets invited to so I can chat it up with other parents who are going through the same things as me.
it's like trauma bonding, but with cheese pizza and cake.
when i was younger i felt a lot more anxiety about not fitting into highly specific, specialist boxes
but i think after following my nose (and my gut primarily) into different fields
i am very okay with what i got from it. i have lived many lives. it doesn't have to make sense to other people. it all makes sense to me.
it matters to me that i've made ice cream and pastry for money and for fun, that i've written about food and politics for money and for fun, that i've gone deep into some very highly specific things i'm interested in that maybe i'll never need again, but who knows
the ability and agency to have followed my nose and my gut into surprising areas has been the highlight of my life. it's been fun!
it's often been scary, but i've never not had fun and i've never been bored.
when i travel, if i see an alley i've never walked through, no matter how 'sketchy', i usually can't resist walking through it to find out. that's been true for real life and for work life and for my brain life as well. that's what energizes me!
is it possible to feel old when you're only 33? because that's where i'm at right now. the world is moving too fast for me.
it's not just technology changes; that's easy to handle. i've noticed a profound ideological shift worldwide that started in roughly 2015 onward.
i was a 90s kid. i feel like i'll probably be obsolete by the year 2035.
i don't say this with any sort of dread. i simply notice that the way human beings fundamentally exist is changing fast, in ways i don't fully understand.
it’s the authentic will of the people when they seem to agree with me.
it’s the way the system is rigged when it appears that they do not.
(hint: there’s no such thing as the authentic will of the people independent of the system by which it is ascertained or constituted.)
:jumping_fox:
they lurk around here.
i was waiting at a crossing and the people in a car were staring at me.
it turned out a fox was next to me waiting to cross too.
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