Notices by Nash (nash@labyrinth.social), page 2

1. bigfoot insurance

3. I charge people $5 to "tell them what I really think of them" and once they pay I tell them I don't really think of them

4. data encryption service where we store you data inside a crypt

5. internet clout futures

6. real world Verified badge

7. multi-level marketing by & for AI's

8. "custom birdhouses for starlings" (we just knock a hole into your building)

9. escape room place run entirely by customers who are trying to escape the special "8-hour, max difficulty" escape room

10. chronotherapy (we tell you to just wait & see if you get any better)

11. authentic reality headset (clear glass glasses)

egglord edgenog

Culty robes,
Take me home
To the crypt where I belong
Necromancer!
Dark Enchanter!
Culty robes,
Take me home

Orb Mode: When Patch is tapped, she enters Orb Mode and may be Pondered. During your untap stage, discard a card from your hand or Patch remains in Orb Mode.

Shin Biter: After Patch leaves Orb Mode, she gains +2🗡️/+0🛡️ for the rest of the turn.

our new Moon Phase AI is a LLM trained on 38 years worth of moon phase data. it uses 25kWh of electricity per post & is correct 32% of the time. also we have gotten it to mostly stop being overtly racist

I thought plums were only meant as breakfast food
Saved for someone else, but not for me
Plums were out to get me
So cold and so sweet
Delicious stonefruit haunted all my dreams

Then I saw her fridge
Now I'm a plum thiever
Please forgive
My obvious crime
Cold sweet plums, I'm a plum thiever,
I'm gonna leave her a short rhyme

reinventing the wheel so I can have a wheel that doesn't sell my data

?may your home projects all require just the one trip to the hardware store?