Not that I would (abusively) treat someone badly or manipulate them to show them how much "better" they have it than if they were in an (abusive) relationship
but like...should someone be aware of that? or prepared to think carefully about how someone might abuse their trust?
How would I raise a femme child who likes straight men, knowing that they're dangerous and knowing that teaching them creates the hypervigilance I'd prefer they didn't have to experience
@paul_ipv6 right, but do I need to teach folks on my team to carry mace or brass knuckles and be afraid of what may lurk in the darkness even though I also want them to feel safe in the darkness on my team?
In which Prince Eric yearns for the sea and for Ariel, so a drag king grants him gills (the upper body of a fish) under the condition that he must not U-Haul with Ariel for at least 3 months
Finally I realized how to express this strength and weakness: I'm good at herding sheep towards a long term goal, but I'm bad at doing that while keeping any particular sheep in the herd
Especially if that particular sheep is unfamiliar and highly complex, or has highly persnickety simple steps (LOOKING AT YOU, EXPENSES ๐ )
@ryanc@manawyrm I worry because I think that is likely not going to be healthy and I want for you to find the places where you can effectively influence humans, regulations, policies, and laws
It doesn't help anyone if you're (electronically, physically, and socially) isolated, jailed, killed, or further traumatized.
Real talk: Trauma can incapacitate and isn't always recoverable. We like to talk about how to heal from trauma, but...it's inherently permanently damaging. We can in many cases with the requisite support recover nearly all of our functionality. Not all trauma is recoverable. And the changes from that can severely interfere with your life goals.
Don't fuck with the UAE. Don't visit, don't do a layover, don't stop there on the way somewhere else. Don't stop, don't pass go, or go directly to jail
UAE is not a safe place, and that is not something to challenge, it is dangerous @ryanc
"The only useful numbers are zero, one, and 'more than half'. Every other number is made up garbage." "They need confidence intervals" "But they don't actually get real confidence intervals! They make up garbage!" "They use bootstrap confidence intervals" "That's just a synonym for garbage!"
Mathematician, Insecurity Princess. Netflix Cloud Infrastructure Security Manager. Queer femme. Dismantling systemic barriers in tech, one fencepost problem at a time