Every morning at the clean-room you could see him arrive
He stood five foot two and weighed one forty-five
Kind of smart he was, there was alot he knowed
and everybody knew that you couldn't outcode Big John
Big John
John Mastodon
Then came the day at the crypto mine
When a server smoked and the men started crying
Bro's were praying and hearts beat fast
And everybody thought they'd bitcoined their last, 'cept John
Big John
John Mastodon
Through the overspeeds and countersuits, this man made of Hell
Fingers flying on the keyboards as the miners pride swelled
He grabbed banned Twitters and gave out with a groan
"Fuck crypto", I'm off to the Fedi, and home.
Big John
Big Bad John Mastodon