Notices by candy !!!!!! (ellieposting@brain.worm.pink)

remember . ppl have looked cool smoking but Nobody has ever looked cool Vaping

how it feels posting abt men on the fediverse as a woman

Incredible language

this is still my fav tweet of all time

i need asmongold to be shot dead im so serious

next instance i own is gonna be bedwetting.social

@fiore ANSOLIUTELY IM FEDI’S FAVORITE PEEPOSTER

@fiore waitt yes u right

THIS IS LITERALLY ME

this is how to make Any woman fall in love with you . only issue is that she has to be like , at least 6 months older than you & u have to be okay with acting REALLY pathetic . this WILL work 100% of the time and you SHOULD try it . here’s the step by step breakdown ;

1. find the woman . where you find her is up to you .
2. organize a date at her favorite location
3. during said date , make sure to talk about your mommy issues . if u dont have any , make shit up . just do it natrually
4. after the date , ask her to take you home .
5. after you get home & you’re about to say goodbye , do something pathetic . anything . slip in the ground and get hurt , start clinging onto her leg , pee yourself , anything . try doing mutiple of these .
6. cry . like , sob . this , along with her view of you being pathetic & having mommy issues , will trigger her maternal insticts . THIS IS YOUR CHANCE . don’t mess it up now .
7. while she’s holding you and telling you its alright , call her “mom” . THIS IS THE MOST IMPORTANT STEP . THIS IS WHAT BINDS HER TO YOU VIA IMPRINTING . she will now feel responsible as your gaurdian , & fall in love with you . mission success .

being an adult is scary man i dont wanna worry abt lame shit like Car Insurance & the Housing Crisis

@fiore as you SHOULD be <3

no one even wants a girl with scoliosis anymore :/

@fiore omg r u also scoliosis 4 scoliosis ….

duuude they compressed me into a .zip file 😭😭😭 bro help 😭😭😭😭😭 get winrar

Trvthnvke son or Darkwoke daughter

@demi Thanks for asking ^_^ Not really no

“screw driver” ? maybe he should take me out to dinner first …. heh heh heh heh 🪛🪛🪛🪛

god tier reaction image