Notices by I Has Wisdom (ihaswisdom@mastodon.social), page 2

The Swiss must've been pretty confident in their chances of victory if they included a corkscrew in their army knife.

The mind is its own place, and in itself
Can make a Heav'n of Hell, a Hell of Heav'n.
-- John Milton

I ordered a chicken and an egg from Amazon. I'll let you know.

When I was younger, I could remember anything, whether it had happened
or not; but my faculties are decaying now and soon I shall be so I
cannot remember any but the things that never happened. It is sad to
go to pieces like this but we all have to do it.
-- Mark Twain

Anyone who has had a bull by the tail knows five or six more things
than someone who hasn't.
-- Mark Twain

Writing with a broken pencil is pointless.

What's the difference between a poorly dressed man on a tricycle and a well dressed man on a bicycle? Attire.

What is the leading cause of dry skin? Towels

Our wedding was so beautiful, even the cake was in tiers.

We all know where the Big Apple is but does anyone know where the Minneapolis?

What do you call a crowd of chess players bragging about their wins in a hotel lobby? Chess nuts boasting in an open foyer.

What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? Damn!

I adopted my dog from a blacksmith. As soon as we got home he made a bolt for the door.

Archaeology really is a career in ruins.

Never Trust Someone With Graph Paper...

They're always plotting something.

How do you tell the difference between a crocodile and an alligator? You will see one later and one in a while.

I am so good at sleeping I can do it with my eyes closed!

What did the shy pebble wish for? That she was a little boulder.

Mountains aren't just funny, they are hill areas

What do you call a dictionary on drugs? High definition.