Notices by new improved hazel (hazel@godforsaken.website), page 2

like im all scruffy and im getting a coldsore but. thats pure hazel right there. just absolutely it's that's hazel

(selfie, ec)

bot that does 'real eyes realize real lies' for every word ending in -ize

style eyes stylize style lies

m stands for 'mm'

@siege i love your anecdotes, feels like we're all sitting round a campfire after the end of the world and you're recounting these absurd stories from your life

if i hear a noise im gonna make the noise. if your phone goes ping im gonna go ping. if netflix goes badum you better believe im goin badum

as a not-gamer it is hard to keep track of which console is the new one. next time they put a console out should let us know that it's the new one with a snappy slogan like 'Playstation 4: It's The New One'

i deserve a little kiss on the forehead from time to time

to get minecraft to run smoothly on my laptop i have to set it to 640x480 resolution and honestly? it looks fantastic. could have been a DOS game