Notices by Saethelred the Unsteady (sethrudy@c18.masto.host)

Admin: AI is here to stay
Me: so is herpes, but they shouldn’t get it in the classroom

I would buy whatever cologne this cat is selling #caturday

Ian Malcolm: your scientists were so preoccupied with whether or not they could, they didn’t stop to—
Tech bros: oh sorry, while you were talking we taught the T-Rex how to use a gun. What were you saying?

There is no amount of warning you can give people that will prevent those people from screaming “why didn’t anyone warn us?” when the thing you warned them about happens exactly as you warned them it would.

We gotta bring back those this is your brain on drugs commercials except for AI.

https://publichealthpolicyjournal.com/mit-study-finds-artificial-intelligence-use-reprograms-the-brain-leading-to-cognitive-decline/

If anyone ever hears from me again, it means I did *not* win tonight’s Powerball

People are mocking his swollen ankles and splotchy hand, but imagine having a heart and mind so awful that even your own blood is trying to get as far away from them as possible

Reporter: what are you going to do to keep your data centers from destroying the planet?
Tech bros: we have a robust set of ambitious strategies to—
Reporter: *shoots dart full of truth serum into their necks*
Tech bros: oh god, nothing, nothing at all. You’re fucked, obviously, but we’ll all be fine, so we absolutely don’t care. Not at all. If we could cool our racks for less money by liquefying your pets, we would absolutely do it. You got a cat? You look like you got a cat. Gimme your cat.

First they came for the oh shit the fuckers are here for me already that was fast

Death smiles at us all, yet I must still do laundry

Gerrymandering my bedroom to see if maybe I can unseat the cat and retake the house

Planet: getting very hot around here you know
People who could fix it: I’M SORRY WHAT I CANT HEAR YOU THROUGH ALL MY MONEY
Planet: Are you burning
People who could fix it: HELL YES I AM EARNING

I have a fantasy where on day one of class I go in, put my feet on the table, take out my phone, and say “hey everyone we’re using AI for everything this term so I’m just gonna hang out and do other work. Due dates are on the syllabus but honestly submit whatever whenever, doesn’t really matter.” And then I go OH DO YOU FEEL CHEATED AND LIKE THIS CLASS IS A WASTE OF YOUR TIME? DO YOU? DO YOU?!

Kid lost a tooth! Do we think the Tooth Fairy operates in a market economy where they’re selling the teeth on at a significant markup, or is the money summoned out of the ether as a meaningless token for silly humans?

People thinking the midterms gonna be like

I don’t get it. I just don’t. If I had a billion dollars the world would just never hear from me again. Like yeah I’ll set up a Wayne Foundation or something, but me, personally? I’m out. I’m gone. I’m a Seth-shaped hole in the wall and a vapor trail.

TFW you wake up because you thought you heard your kid crying but it turned out to be a seagull because you’re at the seaside

And then TFW you think well I’m up now so I might as well see if the fucking seagull needs anything

The child was somehow introduced to ABBA so now it’s just endless Mamma Mias in here and I hope some of you will visit me in the sanitarium

Me: ok air conditioner, it’s gonna be tough week. I believe in you. We’re going to have to work hard, but together we’ll make it
A/C: what if, instead of that, I leak water through your floor, warp some boards, ruin the paint, and cost you $600 for an emergency plumber at around 10 tonight
Me:
A/C: also Satan says hi

Taking a synagogue tour and the membership person assured me, unprompted, that all the exterior windows were recently upgraded with ballistic glazing. So.