Notices by NewsThump (newsthump@mastodon.online)

NEWS! Trump funeral remains America's top sexual fantasy https://buff.ly/lBoAWwk

NEWS! Labour congratulated on class April Fool's ruse after announcing plan to implement genuinely left-wing policy https://buff.ly/NWwruV3

Any parent reading this will know the unconditional love you have for your children. It is literally UNconditional.

However, here is Elon saying his child is dead because they're trans. Not committed a horrific crime. Not murdered anyone. Not even shoplifted.

They're just trans.

That's it. And now dead to him.

If he can't have empathy for his own children, what makes you think he gives two shits about the rest of you?

Oh, look, Mr Free-Speech-Absolutist is up to his usual tricks when authoritarians ask him to suppress the speech of opposition figures...

NEWS! Noted philanthropist Donald Trump makes buying stocks affordable to all Americans through kind-hearted economic crash https://buff.ly/woGCA6k

NEWS! Vladimir Putin wins Oscar for Best Director of a Foreign Country https://buff.ly/5GI9Nxe

NEWS! "You could have made a deal", Trump blames Poland for starting World War II https://buff.ly/4i2mZWH

It's been a while since we shared this, but given the rise of RFK Jnr, we thought it was appropriate to dust it off! It's still available on a T-shirt and mug here >>> https://shop.newsthump.com/product/anti-vaxxer-venn-diagram-t-shirt/?utm_source=Mastodon&utm_medium=image-post&utm_campaign=140225AntiVaxTee

NEWS! Company insisting you can no longer 'work from home' also expects you to respond to work emails after you've 'gone home' https://buff.ly/4jqeB4F

SpaceX referring to their Starship blowing up as "a rapid unscheduled disassembly" is honestly the funniest thing Musk has ever been involved in. Shame it was unintentional.

If Elon Musk buys Liverpool football club, it'll be less than six months before he issues a lawsuit for the right to call himself the club's founder.

ICYMI: Musk is letting his feelings be known...

NEWS! ‘Palpatine doesn’t have what it takes to be leader of Galactic Empire', insists Elon Musk https://buff.ly/4fNNgX0

NEWS! Elon Musk comes out in support of trans community after self-identifying as a Tesla founder https://buff.ly/3ZWVaHU

Matt Gaetz reading through the evidence against Hunter Biden must have felt like he was reading his own diary... only the women Hunter paid for were all over 18.

Your casual reminder that Sissy SpaceX just spent $150m ensuring the US will have a president in his 80s 🤷🏻♂️

NEWS! Elon Musk's DOGE secures first big efficiency win by saving $190m of government money that was about to be wasted on child cancer research https://buff.ly/49P8JgZ

NEWS! Widespread fury as violent milkshake thrower avoids death penalty https://buff.ly/3DlG8Uv

Good news everyone! Lozza has decided you only have to pay taxes when the government is doing things you like and agree with!

Why did no one think of doing this sooner?!

NEWS! Elon Musk buys Santa Claus and introduces new $9 fee to ensure "any child" can become verified and write to him https://buff.ly/4gcpEfU