if a lucky few win a lottery while several lose big, that doesn't make lottery good, does it?

I'm not much of an expert, nor do I play one on fediverse.tv, but IIUC the various different brain settings that give rise to neurodiversity may sometimes (only sometimes) allocate some of the brain budget to certain functions that may then feel like superpowers (more often undesirable, such as oversensitivity, than desirable AFAIK), but the budget reallocation takes away from other functions

given tolerance for diversity, lots of love and suitable education, these minorities may live a reasonably happy life despite our shortcomings.

but others aren't so lucky WRT tolerance, love, and education, and that may bring significant misery to the person and to those around them

natural selection suggests that, if these traits have survived for so many generations, it's probably because they bring some benefit. but we have to recall natural selection doesn't care about the individuals or the misery they go through, but about fitness advantages they bring to a population in which these features are present and may be passed on. some might assign that value to the occasional superpowers that enable individuals to make significant contributions to their communities. me, I bet the better community fitness has to do with diversity by itself. the traits you mention are valuable for a population even if only a minority carries them