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You can totally understand how someone, presented with a set of information, would think you're terrible.
And it's gonna hurt the most realizing there's no resolution to your story for them. There is no redemption. You're just going to have to live with an exponential where millions believe you suck. But just as easily as they cast aspersion, you can categorize it as not emotionally important. This is going to be hard.

Your moral waypoints should center on your closest friends and those who've known you the longest. Hopefully you're not a billionaire surrounded by groupies then you're fucked.

You should really probably reflect on how you got to this position. And earnestly address it and take it seriously. Maybe?

But that isn't the end of you as a person. Unfortunately, you probably are going to need to keep doing "this" for a handful of decades. Not posting online – which is stupid as fuck and nobody should ever do – but waking up each day.

Nobody typing shit into their phone is going to change the fact you're going to wake up tomorrow. Only you can fuck that up.

Best regards. 🙂