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Also, because I end up having to say this every time:

People who’ve suffered abuse and trauma in the name of a religion are in my view under no obligation to make nice with that religion. That’s not at all what I’m talking about, just in case any part of the above comes off that way. Anyone who is escaping trauma is first and foremost entitled to care for themselves and leave and reject the locus of that trauma, including but not limited to religion.