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One day you couldn't sleep and you were looking at your phone at 3am when a notification popped up saying your friend-status-thing app was synchronizing. You got curious and tapped on the thing and watched it.

It told you that some of your friends had nominated you as one of their trusted text backups, and your phone was now checking all their posts and downloading any it'd missed, so if their phone got stolen by a crow or buried under a tree then they could come round your house with their new phone and get their old posts back. You remember seeing the option when you first installed the app, and you didn't bother with it, but in that moment you felt weirdly grown-up and reliable, and you told yourself to try and remember to sort out backups tomorrow.

You watched it looking at each post in turn and getting the comments and reactions and stuff, and you imagined some scruffy little librarian raccoon nodding and scribbling notes and putting them in lots of different drawers, making sure that nobody lost anything. This somehow made you feel safe.

You were glad it decided to do all this when you were asleep, because your phone got kinda warm.