It's fun that there's no noticeable overhead from running Ubuntu or Gentoo in VirtualBox, in WSL, or on bare metal, except for the suboptimal VirtualBox-on-Hyper-V case.
Anyway, Gentoo, I just discovered "-march=native" doesn't seem to be the best choice for AMD CPUs. At least according to Rust's "rustc -C target-cpu=help", LLVM seems to think it's a generic x86-64 but not anything specific". GCC's flags passed to cc1plus indicate it's enabling MMX, SSE, AVX, etc. as individual feature flags.