You cannot be one of the good ones. No accommodation you give them will be adequate and, in fact, will only lead to them taking more ground.
The leopards will always eat your face too, in the end.
Marilyn Frye—a TERF—described oppression as a cage and I've long maintained that by her own analysis trans people _are_ oppressed.
We are given impossible questions to resolve then told it is our fault for not resolving them. They hate us because they need a target to hate, not because of us.