One time I was out in front of my apartment pumping up a bike tire. I looked up, and the retard was there with his bike.

He proceeded to ask me of I could pump up his back tire.

I look at his bike. The back innertube is outside of the tire and wrapped up in the front gear.

I look at him and say. I don't think I can pump that up.

He then says "OK," and tries to ride off on the bike.