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We both recognize that all of this is nuts. Way too hard. Cuts against things we care about.

But, here's the thing: pushing back puts us into precarity, and as currently our sole breadwinner (I mean, my PhD stipend is not literally nothing, but ... 😂 ) he feels that first and urgently. Rationally or not, he's SCARED to push back, including naming and holding to reasonable limits for our family.