Them: "Hi, how are you today?"
Me: "Fine."*
*Easier to say 'fine' than 'I feel like I'm living in a time in which mass psychosis is ravaging at least half the population; like I'm a passenger in a car being driven at 120mph toward a cliff edge by an unhinged driver who has never driven before but, in his derangement, a) believes he's Cowboy Jesus riding a tamed dinosaur, and b) has convinced other demented passengers of this, and they are now willing to shred and eat anyone who opposes him.'