I think the thing you realise as you age, is that neoliberalism is the deployed excuse of the ineffectual in govt, a corrupted seat occupier, who has little intention of actions beyond pillage and securing their own personal advantage. It is a system designed to avoid recrimination for heinous acts antidemocratic and non-representational, committed while acting as a quisling for private interests within your own govt. Rentier, to war criminal.