@augustus One day, the Football and the Groin had an argument to see who is better.

The Football said, "I am bigger and rounder than you, thus I am better."
The groin said, "Ah, but we are two, and we believe in strength in numbers"

They could not reach a conclusion, and thus asked a passing donkey to decide.

The donkey said, "I know not about balls, but what I am good at is kicking them." The groin shriveled up ashamed!