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From The Feminist Killjoy Handbook:

"If pointing out sexism or racism means being judged as snapping a bond, as cutting yourself off from friends or family, it does not mean that was the aim. Rather, your experience of snapping teaches you about that bond; how it comes with conditions. We often learn conditions by failing to meet them. You realize that sustaining a bond might mean not saying certain things, not doing certain things, not noticing them, even. So even if you did not aim to snap a bond, when a bond snaps as a consequence of what you say or do, snapping can teach you why you need to snap; you snap; you get out of the room, you can breathe.

When a bond requires overlooking violence, overlooking racism, overlooking ourselves, we might need to snap the bond. Perhaps that is what a killjoy is doing or saying: she is showing that she is unwilling to meet the conditions for being with others."