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<blockquote style="position: relative; padding-left: 55px;"><section><a href="https://fosstodon.org/users/benjaminhollon/statuses/109820207570155015">Benjamin Hollon (benjaminhollon@fosstodon.org)'s status on Wednesday, 07-Feb-2024 13:54:14 JST</a><a href="https://fosstodon.org/@benjaminhollon" title="benjaminhollon@fosstodon.org"><img src="https://gnusocial.jp/avatar/9628-48-20230107023642.webp" width="48" height="48" alt="Benjamin Hollon" style="position: absolute; left: 0; top: 0;">Benjamin Hollon</a><div><ul><li></ul></div></section><article><p><a href="https://fosstodon.org/@joel">@joel</a><br>I gotchu. xkcd#1934.</p></article><footer><a rel="bookmark" href="https://gnusocial.jp/conversation/2687048#notice-5327858">In conversation</a><time datetime="2024-02-07T13:54:14+09:00" title="Wednesday, 07-Feb-2024 13:54:14 JST">about a year ago</time> <span>from <span><a href="https://fosstodon.org/@benjaminhollon/109820207570155015" rel="external" title="Sent from fosstodon.org via ActivityPub">fosstodon.org</a></span></span><a href="https://fosstodon.org/@benjaminhollon/109820207570155015">permalink</a><h4>Attachments</h4><ol><li><label><a rel="external" href="https://gnusocial.jp/attachment/2225387">[The content of a configuration screen on a smartphone is shown. All items listed are activated as indicated by green switches.]
Security Options
Passcode to unlock (Set Code)
Erase phone after ten failed unlock attempts
If stolen, phone can be remotely
Tracked
Erased
Detonated
If phone is stolen, erase data and play an earsplitting siren until the battery dies or is removed
If phone is stolen, do a fake factory reset. Then, in the background...
...constantly request dozens of simultaneous rideshares to the phone's location
...automatically order food to phone's location from every delivery place within 20 miles
...if thief logs in to Facebook, send hostile messages to all their family members
...automatically direct self-driving car to drive toward phone's location at 5 mph
...take photos of random objects at the thief's address and post them as "free" on Craigslist and Nextdoor</a></label><br><a href="https://cdn.fosstodon.org/media_attachments/files/109/820/207/436/525/295/original/5db296021732c480.png" rel="external">https://cdn.fosstodon.org/media_attachments/files/109/820/207/436/525/295/original/5db296021732c480.png</a></li></ol></footer></blockquote>

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Benjamin Hollon (benjaminhollon@fosstodon.org)'s status on Wednesday, 07-Feb-2024 13:54:14 JSTBenjamin Hollon
- Joel :void: :casio:
@joel
I gotchu. xkcd#1934.
In conversationabout a year ago from fosstodon.orgpermalink
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1. [The content of a configuration screen on a smartphone is shown. All items listed are activated as indicated by green switches.] Security Options Passcode to unlock (Set Code) Erase phone after ten failed unlock attempts If stolen, phone can be remotely Tracked Erased Detonated If phone is stolen, erase data and play an earsplitting siren until the battery dies or is removed If phone is stolen, do a fake factory reset. Then, in the background... ...constantly request dozens of simultaneous rideshares to the phone's location ...automatically order food to phone's location from every delivery place within 20 miles ...if thief logs in to Facebook, send hostile messages to all their family members ...automatically direct self-driving car to drive toward phone's location at 5 mph ...take photos of random objects at the thief's address and post them as "free" on Craigslist and Nextdoor
  https://cdn.fosstodon.org/media_attachments/files/109/820/207/436/525/295/original/5db296021732c480.png

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