I was asked what I wanted for my birthday the other day and while I didn’t answer directly, the only thing that sprang to mind was “To not be abandoned by the people that I love.”
I should probably add “To not be compelled to feel afraid of the people I love” to that too. Those make up the recurring theme oh my life: people put you on pedestals; publicly and privately refer to you as the greatest thing since sliced bread; commit to helping you through your struggles; and then once disaffected? They punish you for it and treat you like any old criminal.
Frankly, I’m tired of that but more than that, I’m tired of crucifying myself for another person’s inability to live up to their word.