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I’ll always advocate for communicating your feelings and needs directly and assertively. Something I’ve learned in therapy is this template for communicating where you say like “When you [discourage me from presenting as my gender in public], it makes me feel [anxious]. I want to feel [supported by you]”.

I think it helps to point out that you are listening too by saying something like, “I’m hearing you’re concerned about my safety and that makes sense. I’m worried about it too”