@sneeden
Yeah thats fair, and also the ideal for sure.
I think self-serve banners are quite cute. I've used 4chan ones and got most of my users that way. They arent very in the way I like seeing them personally (as well as being a good way to give money to a site and getting something out of it)
I'm always looking for sites to whack some money at for a little banner image (ofc I prefer to use/have used said site)

For the forum, I've seen others post about the site on other sites (which is quite a nice feeling),

I think in the cold analytical view until a site gets the ball rolling hard for word of mouth to work.
I do like the webring approach and that sort of thing a lot of these newer old school sites do, so I've tried to lean towards that. I think my forum is a bit too 'modern' for many of their tastes I would imagine

its an interesting element I think about (wanting the site to be alive and all that ofc)