I was in a dead marriage for ten years. Months and months would go by with nothing. Here’s the thing…I never looked at it as an obligation that she just “had to fulfill”. The part that sucked was that the “love” wasn’t there (from both of us, tbh). Absence of sex was just a symptom of that. Sure, there may be physical reasons for having no desire to pork (headaches, etc), but if the emotional desire to be close to someone is there, there WILL be time made for some fackin. For a lot of people, that closeness just isn’t there, and they’ll think it’s just about “her refusing to put out”.