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I think the main reason newcomers thought fedi was confusing was because people kept referring to Mastodon as if it's a platform, and not just a bunch of websites. It's easier to recommend specific instances to people, while letting them know they could talk to people on different websites. The idea of following people on tumblr from twitter is instantly understandable and appealing. Trying to explain Mastodon as if it's all one platform doesn't make any sense.

I also think referring to the network by a piece of server software is a mistake. This also happened on reddit when Lemmy would be suggested. People would search it up and usually find the GitHub page for Lemmy. It's like if you told someone to check out the world wide web, but then linked them to the homepage for the Apache webserver.