imagine you're scrolling through fedi in public. you've been seeing memes, cats, and tons of anime posts. in the middle of the posts, though, you see an nsfw marked post.

"how bad could it be," you think? "it's probably just someone marking a meme as nsfw as a precaution". you glance around to make sure no one is behind you. you tap and reveal the image. you were wrong. it's not a meme. it's fucking samus, tiddies and aliens and all, and it looks grotesque. well, fuck. you were wrong, and you sigh at yourself for not learning your lesson after the 235872385th time this has happened. now, much to your disappointment, you know that your friend REALLY REALLY REALLY wants to screw samus just like three of your other friends.

why is this gay, though?

1. fedi has a mostly male audience. that means that you are exposing your exact kinks, aliens and bondage and overinflated boobs and all, to guys. try telling your flesh-world friends that you have a thing for feet - it won't go over well. the imaginary situation above has probably happened multiple times, with your fedi friends and acquaintances sighing in disappointment.

2. if that imaginary situation didn't happen, something infinitely worse may happen - people might see it, and they might LIKE IT. they might start getting off to it WITH YOU. if you're gonna get off to the exact same erotic slime girl pic at the same time as someone else, you might as well fly over to them, kiss them, and say "bro" as you look into their eyes romantically. your nsfw post is not just a nsfw post. it is a gay invitation to enjoy quality time.

3. no girl will ever engage with your nsfw posts. what do you expect, a dm saying "oh my god, the isabella bondage hentai art you posted is so HOT, please do that to me"? no, you don't. only guys will ever engage with your nsfw posts. you know this.

4. you are sharing what you get off to with guys, and in the process, are making your fedi friends acutely aware of your sexual preferences. your fedi friends (and, don't forget, they are mostly guys) will know exactly how to please you in bed while you have homosexual relations with each other. if someone favorites your nsfw post, you now know that they have the same preferences as you, and you know how to please THEM in bed. come on. send him a DM already. tell him you want to have gay sex while he dresses as astolfo.

I hope you understand the underlying homosexual intentions behind your nsfw posts better now. thank you for reading my essay.