#feditip: go to https://{your mastodon server}/users/{any username}.rss to get an RSS feed for your RSS reader.
Level 2: go about your day without internet, then in the evening settle down at your Computer Desk with a nice cup of tea to RSS-digest the day's shitposts.
Level 3: Aggregates your RSS feeds into epub format. Load the output onto your 2000's e-ink e-reader via USB cable. Sit in an overstuffed armchair with a nearby lamp, say aloud "Ah, yes, today's internet" and sip your port.