Thank you friend. I like @RMIV, and @teknomunk perspective on this. And, you are right, I agree, and my family was very much abused by relatives who used the twisted forgiveness doctrine as a club to beat them into submission.

I even know some Christian men, who at the last midterm election here in the USA, exhorted each other to pray for Joe Biden, for him to be blessed, for him to make good and wise decisions.

So, perhaps I am using the wrong word? Though, to turn away from anger, and desiring someone to be destroyed, that feels like forgiveness to me xD From my perspective, forgiving them benefits me a lot, goodbye bitterness and anger, you wont ruin my day, but we can't reconcile, we can't become friends, until they stop being my enemy, until they repent.