Embed Notice

I’ve lived in big cities my whole life, and there’s something I really enjoy about just… being around a lot, often, around the same bunch of people you see very often. There’s a pastor / social worker who works with the homeless folks (one of the actually good ones), I know she runs a secular gathering every Thursday at a specific spot for anyone who just wants food and warmth. I say hi to every single immigrant restaurant owner in my neighborhood even if I don’t eat there or don’t like their food. I feel like people know me.

And in many regards I feel perfectly happy with a small circle of very good friends, many of whom I’ve known for decades, who don’t necessarily live near me, plus a large network of diffuse relationships connected by geography and language

At least that’s how I’ve made sense of my life here as an immigrant. It’s hard to make deep adult friendships in a place you didn’t grow up in