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Upgrading from iPhone 13 to iPhone 17 isn't evolution. It's Stockholm Syndrome. A ritual of self-delusion wrapped in anodized aluminum & OLED lies. I'm not chasing progress. I'm paying for the privilege of being slowly suffocated by sleeker chains. The apps load faster so they can disappoint me sooner. The screen is brighter so I can see the enshittificaiton in high definition.

My iPhone 13 was the last whisper of restrain, back when apps opened without hissing a subscription in my face.