Cat Hicks
Because mastodon is like a 99% male audience, I will say this: if you have an aging mother you are in relationship with and care about, do NOT make her go through medical stuff alone. I am skilled & mean enough to fight through medical stuff and even so you would not believe how bad it is. Just accept that you cannot imagine.
I talk to a lot of people's aging moms and they are abandoned & alone even in nice families. I don't care how awkward it is, you have to try to ask them about it.
MostlyTato
@treleanor @grimalkina
Not mine either, now you mention it.
Trish Roberts
@grimalkina @MostlyTato 99% male audience? That’s not been my experience
Rich Felker
@MostlyTato @treleanor @grimalkina It doesn't feel like my experience of interacting, but it prompted me to run through my followers list and make a quick estimate. In the most recent ~250, of the ones that I was able to easily guess a gender for (maybe 150), I had about +60 male. That would be around 70%, and maybe more than 80% depending on the ones I didn't attempt to guess or guessed wrong. This is kinda surprising but not surprising.
Rich Felker
@MostlyTato @treleanor @grimalkina And using the same procedure on my follows, out of 952, at least 499 (52%) seem to be non-men. That matches much closer to my experience of interactions on fedi.
Kermode
@grimalkina
I have recently joined a seniors org in my town, because they needed a geek. At the last social I cooked for, I was told that there are 50 volunteers, but I seem to be the only man - which is nice for me! I get lots of companionship cooking and geeking out.
I am aware of the fact that our medical system often disregards women. I do know that.
What can I do?
I can link to sites on our website, have posters made... ??? IDK.
Thank you.
@marcia
Cat Hicks
Our moms are suffering because no one cares and they aren't telling anyone. They're getting diagnoses 15 years late, they're being bullied about medications, they're silent about what they're going through.
The difference between the younger women and the older women in the patient groups I'm in is horrific. I have listened to many, many people's moms describe years of suffering that could've been prevented. I am not trying to lay on any guilt. I'm just saying a little bit could go a long way.
Cat Hicks
It doesn't have to be this way. I have helped multiple older women argue to get past primary care and get to specialists and learn that there is better science than decades ago, that has studied more women, but there's only one of me in these chats. You can't fix the system but if you have an older woman in your life you can ask if you can research something for them, or go to an appointment and make sure they're heard, or suggest the random pains they have are a thing that needs attention.
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