Conversation

Notices

1. Embed this notice
   Adrianna Tan (skinnylatte@hachyderm.io)'s status on Saturday, 14-Feb-2026 06:28:24 JST Adrianna Tan

   I find ‘things-gifting’ culture very strange. I don’t understand the rules. I was looking up Chinese new year gifts and things that are commonly given: a huge box of Hawaiian longans. $388 worth of high end Korean ginseng. Lots and lots of mandarins.

   And of course giving cold hard cash is even better.

   • Embed this notice
     SnoopJ (snoopj@hachyderm.io)'s status on Saturday, 14-Feb-2026 06:29:24 JST SnoopJ

     in reply to

     @skinnylatte as long as it's not in a potato chip bag

   • Embed this notice
     Adrianna Tan (skinnylatte@hachyderm.io)'s status on Saturday, 14-Feb-2026 06:29:45 JST Adrianna Tan

     in reply to

     @SnoopJ I would love a mushroom and mandarin flavored chip

   • Embed this notice
     Adrianna Tan (skinnylatte@hachyderm.io)'s status on Saturday, 14-Feb-2026 06:33:31 JST Adrianna Tan

     in reply to

     Related to how I’ve said before that ‘having strong opinions on food’ is not picky, but perceived as smart and street smart: if you are someone who buys a touristy quality low quality food gift, no matter how expensive, that’s not positive. Having money and bi taste is perceived negatively. People would rather receive something cheaper but good quality.

     I’ve never bought a super expensive gift like that but I know that Chinese business practices pretty much require it. There’s almost a sense you can’t trust someone with your money if they don’t know how to select and procure high quality food gifts.

     Short of those skills, cash is fine.

   • Embed this notice
     Adrianna Tan (skinnylatte@hachyderm.io)'s status on Saturday, 14-Feb-2026 06:35:06 JST Adrianna Tan

     in reply to

     So yeah, pajamas and socks and mugs as gifts? Very strange to me

   • Embed this notice
     SnoopJ (snoopj@hachyderm.io)'s status on Saturday, 14-Feb-2026 06:40:57 JST SnoopJ

     in reply to

     @skinnylatte same, but I was cracking a NYCpol-flavored joke on the "cold hard cash"

   • Embed this notice
     Adrianna Tan (skinnylatte@hachyderm.io)'s status on Saturday, 14-Feb-2026 06:53:22 JST Adrianna Tan

     in reply to

     There are probably rules around cash giving. How much and who to give cash to. Has to do with seniority and type of relationship. I can’t say I understand all of it, but I can *guess* quite well (or maybe I’ll ask an elder), but I’m reminded of the time my aunt and I both gave each other $100 in cash, at the same time, and just exchanged the notes symbolically even though it was exactly the same. (And this wasn’t for a special occasion. It was just that we hadn’t see each other in a long time. Me gifting the cash is supposed to be for ‘thanks for being my elder) and her gifting the same cash is supposed to be for ‘nice to see you after so long, younger person’

     I guess I struggled with it more when I was younger, but just gifting food and cash all the time to people who matter to me, seems to be a thing that works well!