@ariadne as I joked about during my trial most of the code I ended with when trying to do more than "little scripts/tests" ended with:
"It enters through the window, unlocks the front door and keeps the key, exits through the window, locks the front door, and then crashes a truck into the garage to steal the garden gnome from the doormat."
On the positive side, I got the "start" and enough frustration to fix this hell to actually start something eh