Conversation

This is a terrible terrible story:

Someone reportedly snatched the Orange Leader and strapped him to one of those giant bird-slaying cancer-causing windmills. At last report he was 100s of feet off the ground and the wind was gusting and he was twirling around vigorously. His mouth was moving but due to the altitude and whatnot, nobody could make out what he was saying. A government lip-reading expert was summoned but she was laid off when the government shut down and can't be found. Officials are afraid to turn off the windmill for fear the Great One will slide off the blade and fall to his death. To further complicate the situation, birds are using the Orange Genius for target practice which is very disrespectful. The Vice President said he would make a statement later but he's such a bad liar that the networks don't care. And the Chinese somehow got footage of the incident and are showing it 24/7 with derogatory remarks. One popular Chinese site's comments translate as "It's a bird! It's a plane! It's a birdshit-covered windmill decoration!"

C'mon, guys. Show a little respect.