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   Nowhere Girl (gwynnion@mastodon.social)'s status on Thursday, 10-Jul-2025 05:42:11 JST Nowhere Girl

   "trans women get so much shit for acting hyper femme but the reason we do it is it’s the only time we get seen as feminine"

   One of my transition goals was to read as female no matter what I wore or whatever, which is something gender normative cis women take for granted. And I mostly succeed unless I'm very tired or depressed. But unless you transition young or pass very well, you get stuck having to manage other people's perceptions in exchange for basic validity.

   https://bsky.app/profile/leonalurid.bsky.social/post/3ltklsbcg5c2k

   • Embed this notice
     Miakoda (hellomiakoda@pdx.social)'s status on Thursday, 10-Jul-2025 05:42:09 JST Miakoda

     in reply to

     @gwynnion What's a druther?

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     Nowhere Girl (gwynnion@mastodon.social)'s status on Thursday, 10-Jul-2025 05:42:10 JST Nowhere Girl

     in reply to

     It sucks that even other trans people will attack you for it. There's always some "pick me" willing to throw less passing people under the bus. Conversely, some trans people get snotty over wanting to pass at all! "That's not important." Not to you maybe. That's not for you to decide.

     It's exhausting.

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     Nowhere Girl (gwynnion@mastodon.social)'s status on Thursday, 10-Jul-2025 05:42:10 JST Nowhere Girl

     in reply to

     If I had my druthers, I would rather be a conventional heteronormative cis woman so I didn't have to think about it at all.

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     Nowhere Girl (gwynnion@mastodon.social)'s status on Thursday, 10-Jul-2025 05:42:11 JST Nowhere Girl

     in reply to

     You really can't win. If you doll yourself up, they say you're fake and accuse you of reinforcing harmful stereotypes. If you go casual, they attack you for not even trying. They will call you ugly or mannish or whatever over things you literally can't control. And they know it hurts you as a woman even as they insist you're not really a woman at all.

   • Embed this notice
     Nowhere Girl (gwynnion@mastodon.social)'s status on Thursday, 10-Jul-2025 05:42:11 JST Nowhere Girl

     in reply to

     One reason the right has gone after youth transition is because it makes us essentially indistinguishable from cis people, which makes it harder to target us for mockery and violence and thus, harder to perpetuate this bigotry.

     But all most of us want is what cis people take for granted.